Conflict resolution in adolescents and adults

Conflict resolution

1. Resolving Conflicts…
How to friends
By Cara Baldree

2. You Will Learn…
What a conflictis
Why it happens
If anger is bad
How to resolve conflict
Communication Skills
How to have healthy relationships with others

3. Why Is This Important?
So you can be HAPPY!
So you can have a lot of friends.
So you can learn to compromise.
So you can have healthy, lasting relationships.
So you don’t get into trouble.

4. What Is A Conflict?
a fight, battle, or struggle
a collision between ideas
a disagreement between people
a quarrel

5. Why Does ConflictHappen?
There are MANY reasons!!! Some examples are:
1. Someone takes something from you that is yours.
2. Someone teases you.
3. A misunderstanding happens.
4. Plans change.
5. Someone was dishonest.
6. Feelings were hurt.
7. Talk to your table about a conflictyou remember.
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6. Is Anger Bad?
No, no, no….unless it is inappropriately acted
out (i.e. angry words or touch, etc.)
It is NORMAL to feel angry.
What makes YOU angry?
I feel angry when…

7. How Do You ResolveConflict?
Resolve means to fix or find a solution for something.
COMMUNICATE!!
Negotiate(bargaining with someone)
Compromise
Walk Away/ Find help

8. Communicate
Be assertive(speak up respectfully about your
feelings!) DON’Tbe aggressive!
No name calling.
Take turns talking. Don’t interrupt.
Use “I” messages. What’s this??
Examples:
*You never let me play basketball at recess!
I feel hurt when you don’t let me play basketball at recess.
*Stop teasing me about my weight, or I’ll bust your face!
I feel embarrassed when you tease me about my body.

9. Role Play “I” Messages!!
The teacher needs to assign each table one conflict
to act out in front of the class. (e.g. Someone butts
you in the line, or someone left you out from
playing.)
Pick someone from each group to play the
bully/bullies.
Take turns practicing saying the “I” message.
PRACTICE and look the bully in the eye. Use a
calm voice, but be firm.

10. Negotiate
This is like making a bargain.
For this to happen, you must come up with a
plan.
Example: You borrow a book from the library
and put it on your desk. The person next to you
grabs it and begins to read it. You try to be
assertiveand say, “I would like to have my book
back. Please get your own book to read,” but the
person refuses.
You need a plan!!!Talk about a negotiation with
your table.

11. The Plan
Examples you might say to him/ her:
I’ll let you read it when I have finished.
Read it first and then give it back.
* The other person might agree with your plan,
ending the negotiation. If they disagree, keep
negotiating. Sometimes, the other person comes
up with a plan. You can agree or disagree with
this. You may be able to go to the next step:
compromise.

12. Compromise
This is like giving something up in order to both
get at least part of what you wish to have.
A good compromisewill leave both students
feeling that the solution was fair, even if they
didn’t completely get what they wanted.
Compromiseis a part of growing up.

13. PROBLEM!!!
What do you do if a compromiseisn’t made??
Sometimes people won’t compromise.
What now???

14. Walk Away/ Find Help
Walk away and find something new.
Ignore bad behavior from others.
Find help if there is a big problem, but it is best
to learn to use your words to solve conflicts.
ALWAYS SHOW SELF-CONTROL.