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Good evening, I'm Tom Sanders. We interrupt this broadcast of HitRECord on TV to bring you breaking news of a multiple-fatality car accident just outside of town. Our very own Sharon Beckley-Bluefield is on the scene, let's go to her now, live, for more details. Sharon?

- my hair? Good? Any...

Good evening, I'm Tom Sanders. We interrupt this broadcast of HitRECord on TV to bring you breaking news of a multiple-fatality car accident just outside of town. Our very own Sharon Beckley-Bluefield is on the scene, let's go to her now, live, for more details. Sharon?

- my hair? Good? Anything in my nose or teeth? This could be my big break and I swear to God if there's something in my teeth I'll fucking murder you with your own camera.

- (clears throat) Our apologies viewers, Sharon seems to be having some technical difficulties with her in-ear microphone. Do we have her now? Sharon, can you hear me?

- Hi, Tom!

- Sharon, what can you tell us?

- Well Tom, it's a real circus out here. Good evening viewers, Sharon Beckley-Bluefield here, coming to you live from the scene of a very serious car accident on County Road 42. The death toll continues to rise as more bodies are pulled from the wreckage.

- Sharon, is it known how many cars were involved in the accident?

- Just one, Tom.

- Really, one car?

- Yes, Tom. Friends and coworkers of the victims state that the clown behind the wheel had just purchased the car early this morning, and invited his associates to go for a ride.

- Pardon the interruption Sharon, but as a news broadcaster I don't think it's appropriate to refer to the driver as a clown.

- Tom, I assure you I used the term in its most literal sense. I did mention we're at a circus.

- Oh, I see, the circus part was literal as well.

- Yes, Tom. May I continue?

- Please.

- Thanks, Tom. According to eye-witness reports, the car carrying a large but unspecified number of clowns was just returning from a drive in the countryside, when it encountered a group of mimes in the road.

- I'm sorry, mimes?

- Yes. Mimes. Is there a problem with my microphone?

- No, please carry on, Sharon.

- Our source, who prefers to remain anonymous, stated that the mimes had some sort of on-going dispute with the magician, who reportedly trapped the mime troupe inside an invisible box in the middle of the road. It's been speculated that upon arriving at the scene, the clown driving would have viewed this as a typical act of mimery, and would have expected that said mimes would soon clear the way. But the driver missed one very important detail.

- What's that, Sharon?

- Well, Tom, we've been told the mimes were screaming. Audibly.

- Fascinating. What happened next?

- Sources say a circus cowboy who was exercising his horses nearby saw what was about to happen and quickly lassoed the invisible box, pulling the mimes out of harm's way.

- That's one quick thinking cowboy!

- Yes, Tom. Unfortunately, the driver then swerved out of control, running full force into a popcorn cart, which promptly exploded.

- Wow!

- Witnesses say the car's doors were jammed shut, trapping the clowns inside. Concerned that the fire would spread to the car's gas tank, the animal trainer rushed over atop an elephant which was able to suck up water from the high-dive po