Deacons Ministry - Caring Skills

This presentation will help deacons and other church workers identify and exercise the skills that are essential for Christian service and good interpersonal relationships.

1. SERVING THROUGH CARING First Baptist Church Bonny Island Jerry Akinsola, [email protected] [phone]

2. What is Caring ?

3. Caring Includes… Identifying with a person or group Responding to needs of others Providing what is necessary for the wellbeing of someone or some thing.

4. Why is Caring Important ?

5. Why Care…? Jesus Expects us to do so. The Early Church cared. People Need It It Grows the Church It develops caregivers  

6. How Can You Show others that You Care ?

7. To serve effectively as a Deacon you need to regularly exercise the following basic caring skills...

8. 9 Basic Caring Skills

9. Listen Listening: The deacon must learn to listen. In listening you should expect revelations and shocking personal disclosures. Learn to keep calm . Listening is essential for discernment. 1

10. Build Trust: Building Trust: The deacon should be trustworthy. Betrayal of trust will shatter the ministry of care. Keep confidential issues secret. Seek consent if you must make disclosures. 2

11. Ask Appropriate Question   Asking Appropriate Question : Ask feeling questions. Ask clarifying questions. Let your questions go beyond focusing on facts . 3

12. Respond Appropriately:   Respond appropriately to the information you receive. Appropriate caring response could either be suggesting a course of action, explain an issue, assuring the person, or seek further information. 4

13. Share Sharing is a basic expression of care. You definitely need to share time and space with the people you are ministering to. There are times you would need to share your ideas, experiences and resources. 5

14. Use Scripture and Prayers: Know the Word and apply it. The Word of God is His solution to our problems. Ensure that any portion of scripture used is relevant. Be natural when praying. Make your prayer meaningful . 6

15. Make Decisions: Solving Problems usually demand making decisions. We helping people make sure you are not treating surface problems. Encourage decisiveness. Talks with no conclusions often become recurrent talks. 7

16.  Follow Ups: Once you start helping a person in problem solving, you need to follow through with notes or visits. You should make referral if time or knowledge will not permit you to continue.   8

17. Report It is important to share your care ministry outcomes with the pastoral leadership. Let the recipients of your ministry know that you are operating under a delegated ministry. 9

18. Four groups a Deacon needs to specially care for…

19. As a Deacon you need to Care for your ….

20. Caring For Your Spouse and Household 1 Tim 5:8, Psalm 78:3-4,7,

21. A Guide for caring for your home …

22. Caring For Your Pastors 1 Tim 5:17 – 18, Galatians 6:6, Heb.13:17

23. A Guide for caring for your Pastor Know Your Pastor Accept your pastor and his or her spouse Provide Resources for Ministry – Exposure and Tools

24. A Guide for caring for your Pastor Meet for his or her financial needs Promote the ministry of your Pastor Provide Spiritual Backup –

25. Caring For Your Members ‘Feed my Sheep’ – John 21:15-17

26. Four Vulnerable Classes of Members …

27. Guide for Ministering to Families and Special Groups   (Students, Professionals, etc )

28. Five Essentials for Caring for Families and …

29. Five Essentials for Caring for Families

30. Guide for Ministering to the Hospitalised

31. HOSPITAL VISITATION MINISTRY The sick provide the deacon a great opportunity or ministering. Four stages are involved in a hospital visitation that bears enduring fruit .

32. Stage 1: Prepare for the Ministry

33. Self-Preparation Plan for spiritual ministry…Hospital ministry is a time for serious, well-planned visitation. Gather all the information that you can about the patient, and their family. Prepare yourself with prayers

34. Self-Preparation Go only while you are in good health with no colds, e.t.c Pack your kit bag (Bible, tracts, cards, note pads, biro) Don’t worry about what to say. Being there is the important thing  

35. Stage 2: At the Hospital

36. Heed Hospital Signs Visiting Hours…Observe the hours set by the hospital. Abide by hospital regulations… Check at the nurse’s station.

37. Heed Hospital Signs The Closed Door…Knock before entering, you are entering someone’s bedroom. Let Medical Care Take Priority…Doctor or Nurse.

38. Stage 3: Visiting the Patient

39. Visiting the Patient The physical condition of the patient should determine the length of your visit Select and use religious resources (prayer, scripture, and tracts) with the specific needs of the person in mind.  

40. Minister To The Patient Be sensitive to the patient’s comfort. Don’t touch the patient unless he or she offers to shake hands. Don’t give medical advice, or interpret medical equipment.

41. Minister to the Patient Don’t rush the visit. Don’t stay too long . Do watch for visitor overload .

42. Minister to the Patient Listen more than you talk. Remember to pray for the patient and others.

43. Minister to the Patient Do follow-up after the patient is at home. Don’t make commitments you cannot fulfill. Do wash your hands after each visit .

44. Stage 3: The Patient’s Family

45. The Patient’s family Stay with them as long as the stay is meaningful. Spend time with them listening actively/attentively Pray with them Notify the pastor when you discover family needs .  

46. CARING FOR THE BEREAVED AND FAILURES  

47. How Do People Feel When the Unexpected Happens  

48. The Grief Cycle Guilt Depression Distress DETACHMENT ACCEPTANCE Apathy Isolation Resignation Withdrawal Reorganization Loss Pain Anger Confusion Anxiety Denial Peace Release Renewal Understanding SHOCK DESPAIR

49. CARING FOR THE BEREAVED Shock and numbness. It is usually marked by denial (a struggle between fantasy and reality).   Despair: Guilt and anger (directed at self or others) . Detachment: Loneliness, apathy, resignation and withdrawals Acceptance of need to keep the struggle alive Recovery and release of one’s self

50. Caring for the Grieving Presence: Use the power of your presence. Visitation matters. Listen: Allow the person to express his or her feelings. Let them talk or cry.

51. Caring for the Grieving Practical Service: Provide practical support . Cook. Run errands. Follow-up: Provide spiritual support. Pray for and with them.

52. Ministry To The Grieving: Dos Do give attention to other family members. Especially the children. Do pray . Do call or visit often afterwards. Do make contact on the one-year anniversary of the death of the loved one.

53. Ministry To The Grieving: Donts Don’t avoid the bereaved. Don’t say, “I understand.” Don’t tell irrelevant or long stories. Don’t cry .

54. MINISTERING TO CHURCH DROP-OUTS  

55. Church Drop-outs are those are expressing a diminishing passion to fellowship and serve in your Congregation ….  

56. Why People Drop Out Church… Doctrine – Disturbing or heretical Divisions in the body Discipline Disappointments (Desires – Doubts) Devil - Demons

57. THE DROP-OUT PROCESS

58. CARING FOR CHURCH DROPOUTS   Don’t mention the church at first. Let the ‘dropout’ talk about himself, family, jobs and problems. Don’t argue or criticize as he or she states his or her position.

59. CARING FOR CHURCH DROPOUTS Express your concern about his relationship with God. Suggest possibilities Share avenue of dealing with spiritual apathy that you or others have experienced .

60. CARING FOR CHURCH DROPOUTS If the visited becomes impatient, terminate the conversation, and set a date for another visit.  

61. Caring For Strangers Titus 1:8

62. A Guide for Ministering to Strangers

63. A Guide for Ministering to Strangers