Counselling skills: Micro skills and stages of counselling

It contains a description of basic counseling skills like attending behavior, active listening, reflection, paraphrasing, and others.

1. Dr. Narendra nath Samantaray [email protected] Micro Skills, Skills & Stages of Counselling

2. Diagnosis helps the doctor, but for the client, the crucial thing is story” -Carl Jung 11/19/2020 [email protected]

3. By the end we will be able to: describe the various counselling techniques; apply the counselling techniques 11/19/2020 [email protected]

4. Few question about individual choices 11/19/2020 [email protected]

5. Skills 11/19/2020 [email protected]

6. Attending Behavior Active Listening & Its stages Reflection Questioning Observation Confrontation Focusing Self Disclosure Other Influencing Skills 11/19/2020 [email protected]

7. ATTENDING BEHAVIOUR 11/19/2020 [email protected]

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9. AB is the behavioral aspect of rapport building PURPOSE: To indicate one is interested in listening and helping client. To encourage the client to talk & open up 11/19/2020 [email protected]

10. Time for a movie clip….BKB 11/19/2020 [email protected]

11. The clips shown just now is for the purpose of communicating the importance of non verbal behaviour in light hearted manner and not to advice to do such acts in roads or anywhere. If any one thinks' so or resemblance seen is purely their fault & coincidental. 11/19/2020 [email protected] DISCLAIMER

12. S → Squarely face the client . Sitting facing the client gives the impression of attentiveness and involvement. O → Open posture. An open posture can show that you are available to listen. It can be gained by sitting with your hands either by your side or resting on your lap if you are writing things down. L → Lean towards the client slightly. This indicates that you are involved and paying attention. E → Eye contact . Maintain appropriate eye contact. It signifies “I’m with you, I want to hear you, and you are interesting to me”. R → Relaxed. Try to remain relaxed with the client. Fidgeting (continuously moving about or looking at the clients’ notes) is distracting for the client and gives the impression that you are not interested in what they are saying. Methods of Attending Behaviour: 11/19/2020 [email protected]

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15. Other Methods Kind, respectable gesture to sit Do not move around Undivided attention Observing silence 11/19/2020 [email protected]

16. When to be used. Can be used throughout entire counselling But particularly important in the initial stages of establishing rapport. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

17. Time for video clips on attending behaviour . 11/19/2020 [email protected]

18. ACTIVE LISTENING 11/19/2020 [email protected]

19. "Everything in writing begins with language. Language begins with listening." --Jeanette Winterson "We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less." –Diogenes Two songs … 11/19/2020 [email protected]

20. Is Active…..purpose Involves more than one sense Part of it already started when you attended him first Active listening is also communicating what you have heard &understood 11/19/2020 [email protected]

21. Purpose: Shows genuine interest Encourages client to speak and reveal more Helps establish a relationship 11/19/2020 [email protected]

22. 11/19/2020 [email protected] How to achieve Active Listening

23. Do not take listening for granted Prepare your environment to support easy listening Show you are listening 11/19/2020 [email protected]

24. How to show that am listening … 11/19/2020 [email protected]

25. Minimal Encouragers Verbal and non-verbal ways of prompting clients to continue talking. Types of encouragers include: Non-verbal minimal responses- nod of the head or positive facial expressions Verbal minimal responses - "Uh-huh" Brief invitations to continue - "Tell me more“ It ALSO INCLUDE SILENCE 11/19/2020 [email protected]

26. Examples of verbal minimal encouragers include words such as: • hmmmm • aha • right…. thik achi • I see • oh? • sure • tell me more….. aau tikiye kuanthu • please continue…… kuanthu kuanthu • really….. satare • yes. The timing of minimal encouragers is important, as overuse can be disruptive and intrusive. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

27. REFLECTION Question to house. What is reflection? Types? Importance? .... RIV 11/19/2020 [email protected]

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29. [email protected] 11/19/2020 Extraordinary Man… Mango Man….

30. Reflective Statements FACTS You are saying….. FEELINGS It seems you are……because……Am I right or something else THOUGHTS You are probably thinking…..because….Am I right or something else 11/19/2020 [email protected]

31. Reflection of Content (Paraphrasing) chooses the most important details of what the client has just said and reflects them back Can be just a few words or one or two brief sentences. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

32. Paraphrasing steps; Listen Rephrase Perception Check: (“Am I right…”). 11/19/2020 [email protected]

33. Reflection of feeling similar to paraphrasing except this skill concentrates upon capturing the emotional undertones and phrases. “You feel disappointed because your mother didn’t call you on your birthday.” 11/19/2020 [email protected]

34. Like paraphrasing, reflection has four aspects: 1. a sentence stem or starter (you sound like you are feeling…….), 2. use of feeling words (sad, relaxed…) 3. use of present tense if possible (more powerful) and 4. an accuracy inquiry. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

35. Reflective Statements FACTS You are saying….. FEELINGS It seems you are……because……Am I right or something else THOUGHTS You are probably thinking…..because….Am I right or something else 11/19/2020 [email protected]

36. Woman: “ I’m the only one working in my family. My mother, my sister and her two children stay with me and my three kids. I can’t afford the school fees for my own children already, so I don’t know what I’m going to do now I’m pregnant again” 11/19/2020 [email protected]

37. Find which was right response: “ You sound worried because you think it would be difficult to afford one more baby, am I right or …” “You sound worried” “ Yes, I know what you are going through. You must be worried. And yes it right to be worried so. Really this is a huge problem” 11/19/2020 [email protected]

38. Time for a song ( Aaina .. lie ) 11/19/2020 [email protected]

39. GROUP ACTIVITY 11/19/2020 [email protected]

40. Manage your emotions Get yourself into neutral mode while listening Do not express irritation, un required critical… Avoid saying you are too busy, much work, “mercy” 11/19/2020 [email protected] Remember Reflection is not accepting their feelings or facts as true or false…

41. Do not Interrupt Overcome your temptation to add your views to conversation Watch your body language to make sure that doesn’t interrupt 11/19/2020 [email protected]

42. Watch the discrepancy "The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said" --Peter Drucker 11/19/2020 [email protected]

43. 11/19/2020 [email protected] Summary of Active Listening

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45. Questioning 11/19/2020 [email protected]

46. Purpose: Effective questioning helps guide the counselling conversation and may assist in enriching the client’s story. When it’s used: information gathering stage . It can however be an important skill to use throughout the entire process. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

47. Open Vs Closed Ended I will share one of my experience…. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

48. Compare.. Have your parents never stopped you taking pan? “Are not you scared when you found you had Hepatitis C?” Have your husband denies using condom? Don’t you want to leave drugs? So, are you here for treatment? Did not you take your medicine regularly? “Could you tell me how your parents ideas about your pan use?” “Describe what happened the day you found out you had Hepatitis C?” “What are views of your husband regarding condom use ? “What does being drug free mean to you?” So, what brought you in here today? How was your pattern of taking medication in last week? Could you explain it? Any issues? Any concerns 11/19/2020 [email protected]

49. What are your thoughts about one more movie clip? Vs. Would you like one more movie clip? 11/19/2020 [email protected]

50. Problematic Questioning Bombardment/grilling Questions as statements (“Don’t you think it would be helpful if you studied more?” “What do you think of trying relaxation exercises instead of what you are doing now?”) Why questions (Why you did that Vs What led you to do that or is there any specific reason you did like that?) 11/19/2020 [email protected]

51. Observation skills 11/19/2020 [email protected]

52. Purpose: Skilled client observation allows the counsellor to identify discrepancies in client’s communication. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

53. For example, when a client enters into the office of the counsellor, the counsellor can gain some indication of how the client is feeling about the session (is he shy, comfortable, awkward?) by the way the client walks in, takes their seat, and greets the counsellor. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

54. If a counsellor asks a question that the client may find embarrassing to answer, the client may lower their eyes, or their head, or look away. Ex..personal affair Give immediately the necessary reason why such question was asked. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

55. Confrontation Link with previous discrepancies 11/19/2020 [email protected]

56. Confrontation are used to highlight discrepancies that clients have previously been unaware or avoided or overlooked of. Following discrepancies might be seen; Thoughts and actions… soch to raha hoon souch khule me na jaaon lekin souch nahin banaya ghar mein Feelings and actions 11/19/2020 [email protected]

57. When to be used: Safer after rapport has been developed. Such statement can be used: “On the one hand …, but on the other hand….” “You say … but you do …,” or “Your words say … but your actions say ….” Followed by, Can you explain it more or Can we understand it much better? 11/19/2020 [email protected]

58. “Your words say you would like to spend more time with your sister, but your actions say that it’s not a priority for you.” Ex: “You say you would like to do further study but you haven’t contacted the training institution.” 11/19/2020 [email protected]

59. FOCUSING 11/19/2020 [email protected]

60. Focusing enables a counsellor to direct client’s conversational flow into certain areas. It is a microskill that is relevant to all stages of a counselling interview. Example: After noticing that a client has mentioned very little about his family, the counsellor, (believing the family is relevant) directs the conversation toward the client’s family. Counsellor can focus on in the counselling session to bring about broader perspectives and potential solutions 11/19/2020 [email protected]

61. Indirect manner: asking Impairment attached to these area…. Individual focus, Main theme or problems focus. Family focus, Cultural/environmental/context focus. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

62. SELF DISCLOSURE 11/19/2020 [email protected]

63. Disadvantages: moving focus from the client & Much time Advantages: Normalization, client's awareness to various viewpoint Guideline: Direct, brief, focused and relevant The process should only be used after considering other options 11/19/2020 [email protected]

64. OTHER INFLUENCING SKILLS 11/19/2020 [email protected]

65. Affirmation Ex- Well done.. You have done good… We expect you that you can… Happy to know that you have come for your results…. Encouraging them to make similar good choices…. NOT OVER AFFIRMATION 11/19/2020 [email protected]

66. Trying to find silver lining if it is feasible: Basic technique is to ask and probe, not simply tell yourself. For example, a client who is upset about having to move away from home is likely to be focusing on the loss of her support network and the familiarity of her community. The counsellor, while acknowledging the client’s loss , could reframe the event to be perceived as an opportunity to experience new places, people and things: an opportunity for growth. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

67. Other thought provoking things to do? Ask client what he could have advised if his friends in similar situation Ask what he could have done if he was in a different state of mind. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

68. Information giving – Any circumstances don’t give any information that you are not well aware of. Simply say, I will get back to you if you really can. Giving menu- Where to go, How to go, Continue Hope but not blind false reassurances like, “ sabu thik haei jiba ….rather aga ku kichi kariheba ” Video Hindi, “ Asha ” 11/19/2020 [email protected]

69. Time for a final song …… Allah ke bande hansde , Jo bhi ho Kal Phir Aayega .. 11/19/2020 [email protected]

70. Thanks for the opportunity of serving you 11/19/2020 [email protected]