First impression in business using body language

How to create a great first impression in business.

1. Types of Non Verbal Communication Facial expressions and eye contact-Kinesics (body motion) , Eye movement ( occulesics ), Smells ( olfactics ) Gesture and posture Vocal characteristics , Vocalics or Paralanguage Personal appearance/ Physical appearance Touching behaviour - Haptics (touch) Use of time and space Artifacts Environmental factors Proxemics - personal space, Chronemics (time)

2. First Impression 1. Eye contact (visual contact) 2. Smile 3. Appearance – the way you look 4. Territory 5. Handshake 6. Verbal greeting

3. Eye Movement - Occulesics Eye movement, length and direction of gaze, frequency changes in pupil size We are hypersensitive to information imparted by eyes

4. How to Read Body Language According to Karla Reed’s Article, “Reading Political Body Language”, below are a few signals to look for Body Language of the Eyes Blinking slowly – indicates lost of interest Blinking excessively – possible indicator of lying or increase in stress level Rolling eyes upward – a sign of disagreement Avoiding eye contact – a sign of lying, guilt, uncomfortable Staring without interruption – an act of threat

5. The gaze Intimate gaze Social gaze Business gaze 5

6. 6 The gaze

7. First Impression 1. Eye contact (visual contact) 2. Smile 3. Appearance – the way you look 4. Territory 5. Handshake 6. Verbal greeting

8. First Impression 1. Eye contact (visual contact) 2. Smile 3. Appearance – the way you look 4. Territory 5. Handshake 6. Verbal greeting

9. Posture Can be a rich source of information about emotional states and relationships

10. Posture 1 2 3 4

11. Posture 1 2 √ Profession - Manager √ Dominant √ High Confidence √ Successful (just got a deal) √ Optimistic √ Opened to something new √ Appealing √ Healthy The same picture in different profiles

12. Posture 3 4 √ Profession – IT √ Submissive √ Low Confidence √ Less Successful √ Pessimistic √ Hiding something √ Doesn’t like to do sports The same picture in different profiles

13. What can posture be used to transmit? Question Statement Interest Non- Interest Confidence Protection Inclusion Exclusion Power Insecurity

14. How Does Posture Communicate? Immediacy – postural behaviors that represent an immediate attitude include direct body orientation, symmetric positioning, and forward leaning of the body Relaxation – backward leaning of the body, reduced tension in the arms and legs, and asymmetry of positioning

15. How Does Posture Communicate? Inclusive versus Noninclusive Face to Face versus Parallel Body Orientation Congruence versus Incongruence Sitting, standing, walking

16. First Impression 1. Eye contact (visual contact) 2. Smile 3. Appearance – the way you look 4. Territory 5. Handshake 6. Verbal greeting

17. Territories and Zones Public Zone 12’ and up Social Zone 4’ – 12’ Personal Zone 18” – 4’ Intimate Zone Touching – 18” 18

18. Territory is an area of place that a persona claims as his own, as if it were an extension of his body. Each person has his own personal territory and when this space is ‘invaded’ we react. 19

19. 1. The intimate zone ( 15cm-45cm) This is by far the most important zone as it is this zone that a persona guards as if it were his on property. Only those who are emotionally close to that person are permitted to enter. This includes lovers, parents, children, close friends, etc. 2. Personal Zone ( 46cm-1.2 m) This is the average distance we stand from others at parties, social functions and friendly gatherings. 3. Social Zone ( 1.2m – 3.6m) On average, we stand this distance from strangers. For example, a new employee at work, a repair man in our home, etc. 4. Public Zone ( over 3.6m/12 feet) This is usually the most comfortable distance at which we stand whenever we address a large group of people. 20

20. Our Intimate Zone is Invaded. Crowding at concerts, cinema, in elevators, buses, etc., is an unavoidable intrusion into one’s intimate zone. Reactions to these intrusions are interesting to observe. There are unwritten rules in Western culture that people follow when faces with a crowded situation. You are not permitted to speak to anyone You must avoid eye contact You are to remain ‘poker face’ – display no emotion If you have a book/paper, appear to be deeply engrossed Limit you body movement In elevators, you are compelled to watch the floor numbers If you doubt this, notice how you behave the next time you are alone in a crowded space. 21

21. 2. Shaking Hands . Shaking hands is a relic from the caveman era. Whenever cavemen met, they would hold their arms in the arm with their palms exposed to show no weapons were being concealed. This palms in the air gesture was modified over centuries The modern for of this ancient greeting is the interlocking and shaking of the palms. 22

22. Culture and hand shaking Man – Man Man –woman Woman – woman Other ways of greeting : bow, fist to fist, etc

23. Peter Collett’s Handshake Theory The Bonecrusher The Limp Handshake The Firm Handshake The Limpet Handshake The Clammy Handshake The Reinforced Handshake The Relocated Handshake The Upper Handshake

24. Handshakes Three basic attitudes are transmitted through the handshake: Submission Equality Dominance

25. Submission is shown by turning hand so that palm is facing upwards during the handshake Fig. 10

26. Equality is shown by turning palm so that it faces neither up nor downwards. Fig. 11

27. Dominance is shown by turning hand so that palm is facing down during the handshake. Fig. 9

28. Disarm a dominant handshake. 29

29. Hybrid Handshakes

30. The Limp Handshake may seem the most likely to offer evidence of submissiveness, but this is not necessarily so, as Collett’s more detailed explanation reveals: “A limp handshake occurs when someone offers a hand that is totally relaxed. It doesn’t exert any pressure on the other person’s hand and it doesn’t contribute to the mutual production of the handshake. A person who offers a limp handshake is someone who, in more senses than one, doesn’t connect with the other person. Like their hand, they remain passive and detached – they’re simply not focused on the person they’re greeting. This often happens with people who are self-important or who have to shake hands with a lot of people…Women who want to cultivate an impression of languid femininity often present a rather limp hand to the person they’re greeting. Strong people often do the same, but in their case it’s to emphasise their strength. It’s said that Mike Tyson offers a relaxed, almost tender hand when he greets people outside the boxing ring – the complete opposite to what happens inside the ring.” ( Collett , 2003)

31. The “Glove” Handshake Fig. 12 “politician’s handshake”. - warmth

32. Clasping the Arm Handshake Fig. 13

33. Knuckle Cruncher Handshake Fig. 14

34. “Dead Fish” Handshake Fig. 15

35. Fingertip Clasp Fig. 16

36. Straight-Arm Extension Handshake Fig. 17

37. The Handshakes - review

38. When you meet somebody for the first time and you greet each other with a hand shake – 1 of 3 basic attitudes are transmitted through the handshake. 1. Dominance 2. Submission 3. Equality 41

39. Ingredients of a Good Handshake Make eye contact and smile. Hold the person's hand firmly. Shake web-to-web, three times maximum. Maintain constant eye contact. Radiate positive aura.

40. Meanings behind handshakes Controller A person extends his hand to you, web-to-web, and as soon as your hands are linked, he purposely maneuvers his hand onto the top. He's telling you he wants to be in charge.

41. Meanings behind handshakes— continued Sandwich Use this one only with people you know. When you envelop another person's hands, you are invading their private space ... where you are to be only when invited. This handshake is also known as the politician's handshake ... which may be cause enough for most people to avoid it!

42. Meanings behind handshakes— continued Dead Fish Imagine rubbing a scaly, dead fish in your hands ... and you got the picture. Your hands typically are wet for two reasons: You are nervous or you have been holding a cold beverage in your right hand and move it to your left just before you shake hands. In either case, it is extremely unpleasant for the receiver. If you experience anxiety, wipe your hands on a napkin, the tablecloth or even lightly on your clothes. As for the beverage, use common sense.

43. Meanings behind handshakes— continued Limp Fingers Women, far more than men, extend their fingers rather than their entire hand. It can be painful for the extender, when she is greeted by a man who shakes with his forceful grip. One of the ways to combat this syndrome is to always extend you full hand (never cup it) horizontally, even if your grip is light.

44. Handshake Blunders Controller Sandwich Dead fish Limp fingers = Shaking the tips of the finger may be perceived as a lack of self confidence. Energetic arm pump - Can sometimes be perceived as insincere. Extending your arm with your palm facing down - This may be be seen as disrespectful.

45. Handshake video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZV_VpXVMVqw (meeting Pepsi race car driver, Jeff Gordon)