Heathers script

1. Heathers
By
Daniel Waters

2. INT. CLASSROOM--DAY
A blackboard reads POOR LITTLE HEATHER.
VERONICA (V.O.)
Heather told everyone about
Heather.
HEATHER MCNAMARA is revealed in the front row wearing her
cheerleader uniform. To the left, HEATHER DUKE dishes with
some dreamy GUYS. At the back of the classroom, VERONICA,
monocle in eye, writes in her diary.
VERONICA (V.O.)
Yes, Dear Diary, I've cut off
Heather Chandler's head and Heather
Duke's head has sprouted in its
place like some mythological thing
my eighth grade boyfriend would
know about. Heather's even doing
the old note trick.
A HOMELY GIRL is seen reading a note, glancing to a TYPICAL
JOCK. VERONICA takes in the wicked panorama of the
classroom.
VERONICA (V.O.)
I've seen J.D.'s way. I've seen
Pauline's way. Nothing's changed. I
guess that's Heather's way. And
jesus, what about J.D.? I can't get
him out of my head. Are we going to
the Prom? Or to Hell? And where's
Heather going?
HEATHER MCNAMARA suddenly rises and walks out of the
classroom, passing a GRUFF TEACHER in a trenchcoat, carrying
a briefcase.
GRUFF TEACHER
Where's Heather going?
HEATHER DUKE
She's going to cry-y-y.
INT. GIRLS BATHROOM--DAY
HEATHER MCNAMARA struggles to open a bottle of sleeping
pills.
(CONTINUED)

3. CONTINUED: 2.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
Fucking child protector caps.
INT. CLASSROOM--DAY
GRUFF TEACHER writes a math problem on the board. A
flustered VERONICA squirms in her seat then leaps up and
runs to the door.
GRUFF TEACHER
Now where's she going?
INT. HALLWAY--DAY
VERONICA races down the hall.
INT. GIRLS BATHROOM--DAY
HEATHER MCNAMARA is a chipmunk with a mouthful of pills.
She pulls a glass from her purse and turns on a faucet, but
no water comes out. She manages to mumble.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
Give me a break.
HEATHER MCNAMARA gets running water from another sink as
VERONICA rushes in. VERONICA punches HEATHER MCNAMARA's face
causing the pills to explode out of her mouth. HEATHER
MCNAMARA slumps against a stall, onto the floor.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
What are you trying to do? Kill me?
VERONICA jumps up and down on the pills on the floor.
VERONICA
What were you trying to do? Sleep?
HEATHER MCNAMARA
Suicide is a private thing.
VERONICA
You're giving your life away to
become a goddamn statistic in U.S.
Fucking A Today. That's got to be
the least private thing I can think
of.
(CONTINUED)

4. CONTINUED: 3.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
But what about Heather and Ram and
Kurt?
VERONICA lunges forward to strike her. HEATHER MCNAMARA
recoils with a wail. Half-regaining her composure, VERONICA
slides down next to HEATHER MCNAMARA.
VERONICA
If everyone jumped off a bridge,
young lady, would you?
HEATHER MCNAMARA wipes tears from her eyes and smiles
weakly.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
Probably....
VERONICA
Hey now, if you were happy every
day of your life, you wouldn't be a
human being, you'd be a game show
host.
HEATHER MCNAMARA
Let's knock off early. Buy some
shoes. Something lame like that.
VERONICA
Sure.