Shrek script[1]

Script para musical Shrek

1. 1



(Curtains open. There’s a house in a forest. Narrator in one corner is sitting with a big book.)

SCENE 1: IN THE FOREST

NARRATOR 1
Once upon a time there was a lovely princess.

NARRATOR 2
But she had an enchantment upon her which could only be broken by love's
first kiss.

NARRATOR 1
She was locked away in a castle guarded by a terrible fire-breathing dragon.

NARRATOR 2
Many brave knights had attempted to free her from this dreadful prison, but
none succeeded.

NARRATOR 1
She waited in the highest room of the tallest tower for her true love's first
kiss.

SHREK
(Laughs.) Like that's ever gonna happen ! (Toilet flush sound. Shrek goes out of the house and
stretches. He sighs. Leaves stage.)

(A group of men enter on the other side of the stage and gather round. One has a “wanted” sign with
Shrek’s face in it.)

MAN1
Do you think it’s in there?

MAN2
All right! Let's get it!

MAN3
Wait. Do you know what that thing can do to you?

MAN4
Yeah, it'll eat you in a sandwich.

(Shrek sneaks up behind them and laughs.)

SHREK
Yes, well, that would be a giant. Now, ogres are much worse.

MEN
No!

2. 2
SHREK
And they would eat your eyes too!

MAN5
Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn you !
(Waves the torch at Shrek.)

(Shrek calmly takes the torch and throws it away. The men shrink back away from him. Shrek roars very
loudly and long. The men are still standing there).

SHREK
This is the part where you run away. (The men scramble to get away. He laughs.)
And stay out! (Looks down and picks up the piece of paper. Reads.) "Wanted. Fairy tale
creatures." (He sighs and throws the paper over his shoulder. Lights out. He leaves the stage.)


SCENE 2: THE NEXT DAY

(Lights on. There is a line of fairy tale creatures: Pinocchio, the three pigs, a witch, a man with a donkey,
Peter Pan and Tinkerbell. The head of the guard is paying people for bringing the fairy tale creatures to
him. There are two more guards behind him taking the characters offstage.)

PETER PAN
I can’t believe we’re here…

TINKER BELL
This is all Wendy’s fault!

PETER PAN
Shut up Tink!

TINKER BELL
No, I’m not! She stole my magic powder, you know what that means? I can’t
fly, I have to walk! My pompon s are falling off my shoes!

(Hook cries.)

TIBKER BELL
Oh, my God! Here he comes…

HOOK
I miss my mummy… and Mr. Smith!

TINKER BELL
Come on Hook, be a man!

(Hook cries louder. They leave the stage.)

HEAD GUARD
Next!

DONKEY
Please, don't turn me in. I'll never sing again. I can change. Please!
Give me another chance!

OLD WOMAN
Shhh!

3. 3
DONKEY
Oh!

HEAD GUARD
Next! What have you got?

OLD WOMAN
Well, I've got a talking donkey.

HEAD GUARD
Donkeys don’t talk! Guards!

(The guards take the man off stage and Donkey runs away. They follow him. Shrek appears on stage.
Donkey hides behind him.)

HEAD GUARD
Hey! Ogre!

SHREK
Yes?

HEAD GUARD
By the order of Lord Farquaad I place you both under arrest !

SHREK
Oh, really? You and who else ?

(The guard turns around and sees nobody’s there. He screams and runs away. Shrek laughs.)

DONKEY
Incredible!

SHREK
Are you talking to me? (He turns around and sees Donkey’s standing there, smiling.)

DONKEY
Yes! Man, it's good to be free!

SHREK
Celebrate it with your friends.

DONKEY
But, uh, I don't have friends. Hey! We can be friends!

SHREK
No. Why are you following me?

DONKEY
I'll tell you why… (Singing.) 'Cause I'm all alone, There's no one here beside
me...

SHREK
Stop singing! Listen, little donkey. L ook at me. What am I?

DONKEY
(Looks all the way up at Shrek.) Uh... tall?

SHREK
No! I'm an ogre! Doesn't that bother you?

4. 4
DONKEY
Nope.

SHREK
Really?

DONKEY
Really.

SHREK
Oh. (Sighs.)

DONKEY
I like you. What's you r name?

SHREK
Shrek.

DONKEY
Who lives there?

SHREK
I do.

DONKEY
But you don’t have any neighbours.

SHREK
I like being alone.

DONKEY
Can I stay with you, please?

SHREK
(Sarcastically.) Of course!

DONKEY
Really?

SHREK
No.

DONKEY
Please! Please! Please!

SHREK
Okay! Okay!

DONKEY
Ah! Thank you! (He hugs him and Shrek pushes him away. Lights out.)


SCENE 3: SHREK'S COTTAGE - NIGHT

(The two stepsisters enter with Cinderella, who’s cleaning the floor.)

STEPSISTER 1
Clean, Cinderella, clean!

5. 5
STEPSISTER 2
Faster, clean faster!

CINDERELLA
But this is a swamp… it’s supposed to be dirty!

STEPSISTER 1
Chst, chst! Clean!

CINDERELLA
But…

STEPSISTER 2
Is she never closing her mouth?

(Shrek is sleeping when he hears a noise. He stands up with a huff. Lights on. He sees a lot o fairy
creatures talking and playing with Donkey.)

SHREK
What are you doing in my house? (Looks angrily at Donkey.)

DONKEY
Hey, don't look at me. I didn't invite them.

PINOCCHIO
No one invited us. They sent us here…

RED RIDINGHOOD
I don’t know what happened… they just took us out of our tales in the middle
of the day…

BAD WOLF
Yes. I was eating a grandma when they gr abbed us and brought us here…

RED RIDINGHOOD
What? It was you who ate my grandma?!

BAD WOLF
Hey! Don’t blame me! I was hungry and she was there!

SHREK
Silence!

RED RIDINGHOOD
Sorry. And you! This isn’t over!

LITTLE PIG 1
Lord Farquaad sent us here.

LITTLE PIG 2
He’s the king of Far, Far, Away.

LITTLE PIG 3
Yes, he’s a bad little man. Hes bad, bad!

SNOWHITE
Yes! He took all my dwarves and hid them in his castle! Now, I’ve got no one
to clean my cottage!

6. 6
STEPSISTER 1
Cinderella! Clean her cottage!

SHREK
Who knows where this Farquaad is?

DONKEY
(Jumping and waving his hand.) I do! I do! I do! I know! Pick me!

SHREK
(Sighs.) Okay. I'm gonna see this Farquaad now and get you all back to your
fairy tales! (To Donkey.) You come with me!

DONKEY
Yeeeees!


SCENE 4: DULOC - KITCHEN

(A masked man enters with the Gingerbread Man. Lord Farquaad walks in too.)

GINGERBREAD MAN
You are a monster!

FARQUAAD
I'm not the monster! You are! You and the rest of that fairy tale trash,
poisoning my perfect world. Now, tell me! Where are the others?

GINGERBREAD MAN
I won’t tell you!

FARQUAAD
Tell me or...

(The door opens and the Head Guard walks in.)

HEAD GUARD
My lord! Here they are!

(More guards enter carrying something that is covered by a sheet. They remove the sheet. There are
three Magic Mirrors.)

FARQUAAD
Magic mirrors...

GINGERBREAD MAN
Don't tell him anything! (The guards take him off stage.)

FARQUAAD
Mirror, mirror on the w all. Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all?

MIRROR 1
Well, technically you're not a king.

FARQUAAD
What?!

7. 7
MIRROR 2
You're not a king yet. But you can become one. All you have to do is marry a
princess.

FARQUAAD
Ahem… (Thinking and rubbing his chin.) Tell me more.

MIRROR 3
(Chuckles nervously.) So, just sit back and relax, my lord, because it's time
for you to meet your princess! And here they are!

MIRROR 1
Princess number one likes sushi. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for
her two evil sisters. Please welcome Cinderella. (Shows picture of Cinderella. Head
Guard and Faarquad clap.)

MIRROR 2
Princess number two is a cape -wearing girl from the land of fancy. S he lives
with seven other men, so she loves playing football . Just kiss her to wake
her up! Here is Snow White! (Shows picture of Snow White. The clap again.)

MIRROR 3
And last, but not least, Princess number three is a fiery redhead from a
dragon-guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! Yours for the rescuing,
Princess Fiona! (Shows picture of Princess Fiona. They clap.)

HEAD GUARD
So will you choose Princess number one, number two or number three?

FARQUAAD
Three? One? Two? Mmmm… number three!

MIRROR 1
Lord Farquaad, you chose Princess Fiona!

FARQUAAD
Princess Fiona. She's perfect. All I have to do is just find someone who can
rescue her...

MIRROR 2
But I probably should mention the little thing that happens at night.

MIRROR 3
Yes, after sunset...

FARQUAAD
Silence! I will make this Princess Fiona my queen, and DuLoc will finally
have the perfect king! Captain, assemble your finest men. We're going to have
a tournament. (Smiles evilly. They leave the stage. Lights out.)


SCENE 5: DULOC

(Shrek and Donkey enter the stage. They hear a trumpet fanfare and Farquaad enters with his three
guards and the Masked man. Four men enter with swords. The two groups stand one in front of the other.
Then, the cheerleading fairies enter.)

8. 8
FAIRIES
D-U-L-L-O-C
Here in DuLoc you will see
Our K-I-N-G
The fairies cheer for our King!

FARQUAAD
Brave knights. The champion shall have the honor to rescue the lovely
Princess Fiona from the dragon. (He notices Shrek.) Wait! What are you? You’re
horrible!


SHREK
Hey! It's just a donkey!

FARQUAAD
(Laughs at Shrek.) Ok. So… (Clears throat.) The one who kills the ogre will be named
champion!

FAIRIES
F-A-R-Q-U-A-D
DuLoc has the greatest king!
Beat the O-G-R-E
And the princess you will meet!

FARQUAAD
Now!

MAN1
Get him!

MAN2
Go ahead!

MAN3
Kill the beast!

MAN4
He’s mine!

MAN5
Now!

SHREK
All right then. Come on! (The four men start running towards Shrek. Farquaad sits and looks,
smiling evilly. They start fighting and Shrek and Donkey start defeating them one by one. Finally all the
men are down. Sound of audience goes wild.)

SHREK
Oh, yeah! Ah! Ah! Thank you! T hank you very much! Ha, ha! (Laughs. Walks to where
Farquaad is.)

FARQUAAD
People of DuLoc, he is the champion!

FAIRIES
Here´s the O-G-R-E
For the champion give a cheer
The D-R-A-G-O-N

9. 9
He will beat and…

WHITE FAIRY
Sorry, I can’t find anything to rhyme with dragon…

FARQUAAD
Ok. Ok. That was very nice… keep on practicing… now, shu, shu! (The fairies leave
the stage.) And you!

SHREK
What?

FARQUAAD
Congratulations, ogre. You won the honor of rescuing Princess Fiona!

SHREK
What? I’m here to get my forest back! The forest where you dumped those
fairy tale creatures!

FARQUAAD
All right, ogre. Let’s make a deal. Go on this quest for me, and
I'll give you your forest back. (They shake hands, Farquaad looks with disgust. He stands
up and he, the guards and the defeated men go off stage.)


SCENE 6: INSIDE THE CASTLE

(They enter again and Shrek is wearing a helmet. They arrive at the castle. They walk quietly, tiptoeing.)

SHREK
Shhh. The princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest
tower.

DONKEY
How do you know?

SHREK
I read it in a book.

DONKEY
Well, at least we know where the princess is, but where's the...

(The Dragon enters and looks at them angrily.)

SHREK
Dragon!

(Shrek manages to grab Donkey out of the way and they both start running. The Dragon chases them,
but they hide and the Dragon leaves the stage, still looking for them. Fiona enters.)


SCENE 7: FIONA'S ROOM

(Shrek groans as he gets up off the floor. Fiona lies back down and appears to be asleep. Shrek turns
and goes over to her. He looks down at Fiona for a moment and she puckers her lips. Shrek takes her by
the shoulders and shakes her away.)

FIONA
Oh! Oh!

10. 10


SHREK
Wake up!

FIONA
What?

SHREK
Are you Princess Fiona?

FIONA
Yes, and I’m waiting for a Prince .

SHREK
Oh, how nice. Now let's go!

FIONA
But wait, Sir. This is our first meeting. It has to be a romantic moment!

SHREK
Yeah, sorry. There's no time. (Takes her hand and makes her go with him.)

FIONA
Hey, wait. What are you doing?

SHREK
Rescuing you.

FIONA
What’s your name?

SHREK
Uh, Shrek.

FIONA
Sir Shrek.

(Suddenly they hear the dragon roar.)

SHREK
Come on!
(Takes off running and drags Fiona behind him. They find Donkey and take him too. The Dragon chases
them for a while but they escape.)


SCENE 8: OUTSIDE THE CASTLE

DONKEY
Hi, Princess!

FIONA
It talks!

SHREK
A lot!

FIONA
Please, take off your helmet, Sir.

11. 11
SHREK
Uh, no.

FIONA
But how will you kiss me?

SHREK
What?

FIONA
Yes. The Prince who saves the Princess has to kiss her. He is her true love!

DONKEY
Wait. You think that Shrek is you r true love?

FIONA
Well, yes.

(Both Donkey and Shrek burst out laughing.)

FIONA
What is so funny? Just take off the helmet.

SHREK
No.

FIONA
Take it off.

SHREK
No!

FIONA
Now!

SHREK
Okay! (Takes off his helmet.)

FIONA
You're a… an ogre.

SHREK
Yes, I was sent to rescue you by Lord Farquaad, okay? He is the one wh o wants
to marry you.

FIONA
Then why didn't he come rescue me?

SHREK
I don’t know. Now, let’s start walking… we have a long trip!

(The three of them start walking. Fiona looks very angry.)


SCENE 9: SUNSET

(They stop to rest. Shrek and Fiona sit together and hold hands.)

DONKEY
(Looks at them and smiles.) Isn't this romantic? Just look at that sunset.

12. 12

FIONA
(Jumps up.) Sunset? Oh, no! It's very late.

SHREK
What?

FIONA
Yes! I need to get some sleep. I must find somewhere to camp now . (She sees a
tree house and goes in.) Good night! (Shuts the door. Shrek and Donkey stay outside.)

SHREK
Good night.

DONKEY
Oh! You are in love!

SHREK
You're crazy!

DONKEY
You have to tell her how you feel!

SHREK
There's nothing to tell. Besides, she's a princess, and I'm an ugly ogre.

(Shrek leaves the stage and donkey falls asleep).


SCENE 10: TIME LAPSE

(Fiona comes out of the tree house. She’s an ogre. She tiptoes but Donkey wakes up and sees her.)

DONKEY
Aaah!

FIONA
Oh, no!

DONKEY
Help!

FIONA
Shhh!

DONKEY
Shrek! Shrek! Shrek! Someone ate the Princess!

FIONA
Donkey, I'm the princess.

DONKEY
What?

FIONA
It's me, in this body.

DONKEY
Oh, my God! What happened to you? You're ugly!

13. 13

FIONA
I know. It only happens when sun goes down. "By night one way, by day
another. This shall be the norm... until you find true love's first kiss...
and then take love's true form." It's a spell. (Sighs.) I have to marry Farquaad
before he sees me like this. (Begins to cry.)

DONKEY
All right, all right. Look, you are ugly. But you only look like this at
night.

FIONA
But Donkey, I'm a pr incess, and a Princess must be beautiful!

DONKEY
Princess, why don’t you marry Shrek?

FIONA
I can’t. I only can be happy if I become a beautiful princess. Please, don’t
tell Shrek. (Shrek enters the stage again and listens, but doesn’t see them.) No one can love
this ugly beast! (Shrek becomes very angry and leaves the stage.)


SCENE 11: MORNING

(Shrek, Fiona and Donkey arrive at the castle. Farquaad enters the stage.)

FARQUAAD
Princess Fiona. (Kisses her hand.)

SHREK
Here she is. Now give me my forest back!

FARQUAAD
Very well, ogre. (Holds out a piece of paper.) Now go away!

(Shrek leaves angrily and Donkey follows him.)

FARQUAAD
Princess Fiona, you are so beautiful, let’s get married tonight!
(They leave and Shrek and Donkey enter again.)

(Hallelujah song playing, kids singing it. Different scenes. Shrek at home alone. Fiona with the wedding
dress. Donkey running into the dragon. They all look lonely.)


SCENE 12: IN THE FOREST

DONKEY
Shrek, what happens?

SHREK
Go away! I don’t want you to come with me! I live alone!

DONKEY
But I thought we were friends.

SHREK
You thought wrong!

14. 14

DONKEY
Hey! This is my half of the forest.

SHREK
What half?

DONKEY
I helped rescue the princess. I did half the work. I get half the forest.

SHREK
Back off!

DONKEY
No, you back off. Now it's my turn! So you just shut up and pay attention!
You are mean to me. You insult me and you don't appreciate anything that I
do!

SHREK
Oh, yeah? Well, if I treated you so bad, why are you still here?

DONKEY
Because that's what friends do! They forgive each other! You're so wrapped up
in layers, onion boy, you're afraid of your own feelings.

SHREK
Go away!

DONKEY
You are doing the same you did to Fiona. She loves you!

SHREK
Loves me? She said I was an ugly monster . I heard the two of you talking.

DONKEY
She wasn't talking about you. She was talking about herself!

SHREK
What?

DONKEY
She was talking about herself. She has a spell on her, at night, she becomes
an ogre.

SHREK
Oh, no! I have to find her.

DONKEY
Don’t worry! (Whistles.)

DRAGON
Did you call me, honey?

DONKEY
Yes, Princess!

DRAGON
Where are we going?

15. 15
DONKEY
Far, Far, Away!

(Suddenly the dragon arrives and they hold hands. They fly away and leave stage.)


SCENE 13: DULOC - CHURCH

(Fiona and Farquaad enter the stage and are getting married. The people of the town are there too. The
masked man holds up a card that says 'Revered Silence'.)

PRIEST
People of DuLoc, we gather here today to bear witness to the union....

(Shrek runs inside with Donkey and Dragon.)

SHREK
(Running toward the altar.) I object!

FARQUAAD
What do you want?

FIONA
What are you doing here?

SHREK
Fiona you can't marry him.

FIONA
And why not?

SHREK
Because I love you!

(The masked man holds up a card that says 'Laugh'. The whole congregation laughs.)

FARQUAAD
An ogre and a princess!

FIONA
Shrek, is this true?

SHREK
Yes.

FIONA
"By night one way, by day another." I wanted to show you before.

(She backs up and as the sun sets she changes into her ogre self. Princess Fiona leaves stage and Ogre
Fiona enters. She gives Shrek a smile. He smiles back.)

FARQUAAD
Ugh! It's disgusting!

DONKEY
Honey, please! (He whistles. Dragon takes Farquaad out of the stage.)

DONKEY
Go, Shrek.

16. 16
SHREK
Fiona?

FIONA
Yes, Shrek?

SHREK
I love you.

FIONA
(Smiles.) I love you too.

(Shrek kisses Fiona’s hand. The masked man takes one of the cards that says 'Awwww' and then shows
it to the congregation.)
CONGREGATION
Aawww!

(Lights out. Lights on. Fiona looks at her hands, confused.)

FIONA
I don't understand. I'm supposed to be beautiful.

SHREK
But you ARE beautiful.

(They smile at each other and hug.)

DONKEY
Awww!

DRAGON
Now, this is a happy ending!

(Shrek and Fiona hold hands and Donkey and Dragon too.)

('I'm a Believer' by Smashmouth is played in the background. Gingerbread Man enters with the rest of the
characters. Some are carrying musical instruments. Shrek and Fiona walk to the middle of the stage as
the rest of the guests party.)

NARRATOR 1
(Enters the stage with the big book and opens it in the middle of the party.) And remember, true
beauty is inside your heart.

NARRATOR 2
And true love is the one that loves you for what you are, no matter if you
are an ogre or an annoying talking donkey. (Starts closing the book and opens it again
fast.) Oh! I almost forgot… and they lived happily ever after! (Closes the book and
parties with the rest of the characters.)


THE END