Supporting Queer Youth: Understanding Terms Around Sexuality and Gender

Supporting Queer Youth: Understanding Terms Around Sexuality and Gender

1. Supporting LGBTQ Youth Presented by Freddy perkins , MMT, mT -BC

2. IMPORTANT CONCEPTS SEX, GENDER, GENDER EXPRESSION, & SEXUALITY

3. THE BINARY MODEL This is how we’re socialized to think about sex, gender, gender expression, and sexuality; however, the dichotomy limits the human experience.

4. Sex Is assigned at birth Referred to as assigned female at birth (AFAB) or assigned male at birth (AMAB) Is determined by genitalia But what about someone with aspects of both? Intersex Physical variations (internal and external sex organs) Chromosomal variations Variations in hormone production and hormone response

5. Gender Internal sense of being a man, woman, both, neither, or any combination of the aforementioned Does NOT have anything to do with genitals or sex assigned at birth Each person gets to define this for themselves Cannot be determined by looking at someone’s appearance or dress

6. Gender Terms Cisgender | A term used to describe a person whose gender identity aligns with those typically associated with the sex assigned to them at birth. Transgender | An umbrella term for people whose gender identity and/or expression is different from cultural expectations based on the sex they were assigned at birth. Being transgender does not imply any specific sexual orientation. Therefore, transgender people may identify as straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, etc. Non-binary | An adjective describing a person who does not identity exclusively as a man or a woman. Non-binary people may identify as being both a man and a woman, somewhere in between, or as a falling completely outside these categories. While many also identify as transgender, not all non-binary people do. Non-binary can also be used as an umbrella term encompassing identities such as agender, bigender, genderqueer, or gender-fluid. (Human Rights Campaign, 2021)

7. Gender Terms – CONT’D Gender-fluid | A person who does not identify with a single fixed gender or has a fluid or unfixed gender identity Gender non-conforming | A broad term referring to people who do not behave in a way that conforms to the traditional expectations of their gender, or whose gender expression does not fit nearly into a category. While many also identify as transgender, not all gender non-conforming people do. Genderqueer| Gender queer people typically reject notions of static categories of gender and embrace a fluidity of gender identity and often, though not always, sexual orientation. People who identify as “genderqueer” may see themselves as being both male and female, neither male nor female or as falling completely outside these categories. Gender-expansive | A person with a wider, more flexible range of gender identity and/or expression than typically associated with the binary gender system. Often used as an umbrella term when referring to young people still exploring the possibilities of their gender expression and/or gender identity. (Human Rights Campaign, 2021

8. Gender expression How one expresses masculinity, femininity, both, or neither through dress, speech, behavior, etc. Does NOT necessarily correspond with gender identity

9. sexuality Describes a person’s sexual attraction based on gender Notice use of the word gender does not necessarily (but can) correspond with sex Does not necessarily (but can) correspond with gender expression

10. Sexuality terms Gay | A person who is emotionally, romantically, or sexually attracted to members of the same gender. Men, women, and non-binary people may use this term to describe themselves. Lesbian | A woman who is emotionally, romantically, or sexually attracted to other women. Women and non-binary people may use this term to describe themselves. Bisexual | A person emotionally, romantically, or sexually attracted to more than one sex, gender or gender identity though not necessarily simultaneously, in the same way or to the same degree. Sometimes used interchangeably with pansexual. Asexual | The lack of a sexual attraction or desire for other people. Pansexual | Describes someone who has the potential for emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to people of any gender though not necessarily simultaneously, in the same way or to the same degree. Sometimes used interchangeably with bisexual. (Human Rights Campaign, 2021

11. Q: Sam is a person assigned female at birth who typically wears dresses, high heels, and lipstick. Based on this description, what is Sam’s gender identity?

12. A: We have no idea! Sam may identify as non-binary, trans man, or cisgender woman…the possibilities are endless Remember: Just because we known someone’s sex assigned at birth or read their gender expression a certain way does not mean we know their gender identity

13. Pronouns Never assume someone’s pronouns based on their physical appearance. As cisgender individuals, always be willing to share your pronouns when introducing yourself. If you mess up, it’s okay. Common Pronouns He/Him/His She/Her/Hers They/Them/Theirs (singular) Neopronouns Xe/ Xem / Xyr Ze/ Zir / Zirs Alternating/Multiple Pronouns Ex. He/They, She/Ze, He/She

14. How to support your child Let them know they are loved Encourage dialogue Learn the facts (DO THE RESEARCH!) Stay involved in their school Advocate for a gay-straight alliance Maintain frequent contact with teachers Push for more inclusive sex education Look out for signs of bullying Behavior change Discipline or behavioral problems in school Declining grades Unexplained absences Sudden shifts in who’s a friend and who’s not Engagement in risk behavior that is out of character for your child Encourage them to form healthy relationships

15. Resources LGBTQ Youth Center [email protected] https://www.lgbtqcenterofdurham.org Instagram: @ queeryouthdurham Human Rights Campaign https://www.hrc.org/resources/parenting PFLAG Raleigh-Durham/Triangle Chapter https://www.pflagtriangle.org/ [email protected] The Trevor Project https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/ Child Welfare Informaiton Gateway https://www.childwelfare.gov/topics/systemwide/diverse-populations/lgbtq/lgbt-families/ Shift NC https://www.shiftnc.org/ Equality NC https://equalitync.org/ Youth Out Right https://www.youthoutright.org/ Time Out Youth https://www.timeoutyouth.org/